Tuesday, June 21st, 2005 • 2 Comments on Is There A Support Group For Me?
3 PM—I will not feed the raccoon today. She is a wild animal and able to forage for her own food. I do not need to take care of her.
5 PM—Well, the raccoon hasn’t come out yet, but I know she will and then the dog will start barking and make me crazy. So I’ll just put out a peanut butter sandwich, some grapes and that chicken wrap I brought home a few nights ago that I won’t eat anyway.
8 PM—The dog is barking. The raccoon is at the back door. I’m not going to feed her any more. She’ll go away eventually. The dog won’t stop barking. Maybe I’ll just give her another peanut butter sandwich and some strawberries.
10 PM—She’s back again. I can’t imagine how she eats this much. All right, one more peanut butter sandwich and a few more grapes. The poor thing must really be hungry to eat so much.
11:00 PM—I wonder if the raccoon is so hungry all the time because she’s not getting the proper nutrition? I’ll look it up. Oh, raccoons also like chicken and fish and eggs and corn and nuts, but red meat isn’t good for them. Okay, no leftover hamburgers for her. Corn is cheap this time of the year, though. I have plenty of eggs. I wonder if it’s good for her to eat raw eggs? It’s not good for people. I know raccoons don’t cook their eggs, but still.
11:30 PM—I have to take the dog out before I go to bed, I’d better bring an apple just in case the raccoon is out there. No, she’s not out. Guess she finally got enough food. I might as well toss the apple over the fence for her in case she gets hungry later. It’s not like I didn’t buy enough apples. And she prefers bananas, so it’s not like I’m really feeding her—any animal could eat that apple.
Midnight—I resolve to better tomorrow. I won’t feed the raccoon. Really, I mean it.
I know, I’m hopeless. But hey, I still haven’t named her.