Sunday, October 28th, 2007 • No Comments on Sunday Mockery
You know, romance novels have long taken the rap for bad titles (and sometimes bad plots). As much as I love and support the genre, there is some truth in it. Often, in an overzealous attempt to make it entirely possible to judge a book by its cover, a publisher will cast aside the author’s perfectly good title for her book and give it a ridiculous title and throw in some gratuitous body parts for fun. This kind of thing is the bane of a romance writer’s existence, knowing that your terrific love story is going to be packaged as something most people will be embarrassed to be seen with in public.
Let me tell you, romance editors aren’t the only ones who create something worthy of scorn. I turned on the television this morning and ran across this:
A woman discovers that her husband is having an affair with their nanny and that he is planning to divorce her. In a desperate attempt to save her marriage, she hires two men to stage a kidnapping of her son and to kill the nanny in the process. The plan, however, goes awry when the men mistakenly break into a neighbor’s house and kill the wrong woman. Through a mix of frequencies in the baby monitors, the nanny is able to hear the men committing the crime and soon learns that she is their intended target. The men quickly realize their mistake and immediately go in pursuit of the nanny.
Now, this might be a perfectly decent movie, albeit reminiscent of Hitchcock’s Dial M for Murder, but who is going to watch something with a title like that? Not me. I get made fun of enough as it is, what with my raccoon-feeding and crazy cat-lady-like behavior.
Friend: So, what did you do on Sunday.
Me: Uh… watched a movie.
Friend: Oh, which one?
Me: Baby Monitor: Sound of Fear
Friend: (laughing hysterically) What??
Me: Baby Monitor… Oh, never mind.
See? You have to lie if you watch this movie. Just as you’d have to lie when you watch the sequel… (wait for it)…
Diaper Genie: Smell of Terror
(I’m not the only one who mocks the silliness. Check out Longmire’s page for a tribute to bad romance cover art. Seriously, they set themselves up for this kind of ridicule.)