Fifteen days until Christmas.

I do not have a Christmas tree (and I’m debating the wisdom of getting a real tree since we have Grace now-- who probably should have been named Tornado). 

The only Christmas cards I have written have been in response to the cards I’ve received (I lack Christmas spirit, not manners). 

The only baking I’ve done has been two double batches of chocolate chip cookies-- one during girl-bonding time with Sheri, the other for a Navy party tomorrow. 

My Christmas shopping isn’t finished, but has been fairly stress-free so far.  No searching for rare and unusual (and expensive) gifts or putting together themed, multi-part gifts.  That’s not to say I’ve been shopping at the Dollar Tree; my favorite part of this holiday has always been choosing thoughtful gifts for the people I care about.  It’s just that this year I’m doing it reasonably instead of over-the-top.  Hopefully no one will be disappointed.

I have been married for fourteen years and this is the first year I haven’t felt the urge to do everything-- and do it perfectly.  I feel a little… guilty, I guess.  I’m supposed to do it all and do it perfectly, aren’t I?  I have always thought so.  This year, for whatever reason, I’m rebelling.  I’m not depressed, I’m not melancholy, I’m not feeling Scrooge-like (in fact, I’m feeling surprisingly giving, but in a altruistic, non-materialistic way).  I’m just slowing down and listening to my heart instead of filling this month with excess and insanity and the need to be perfect.

Maybe this is what Christmas is supposed to feel like.

Posted by Kristina in Life at 12:15 AM Permalink