Friday, May 1st, 2015 • No Comments on New Mom Tips from a Once Clueless Mom
What do paper plates, Amazon, naps and babysitters have in common? They’re all mentioned in my first piece for Mom.me: 7 New Mom Tips from a Military Spouse
Here’s a teaser:
1. I stocked up on paper plates
Seriously. A friend told me about this before I had my son and I know I rolled my eyes. But let me tell you something: When you are sleep-deprived, the fewer chores you have to do, the better. I could still eat something halfway nutritious without moaning over the dishes. And yes, I have a dishwasher, but the loading and unloading of a dishwasher is even more exhausting when you’re already exhausted. Invest in a 500 pack of paper plates and don’t suffer a moment’s guilt over using them. For that matter, stock up on aluminum foil and any other disposable product that will make your life easier. You can save the environment when baby is older and sleeping through the night.
That’s a stock photo that goes along with my post, but here is the real thing as it was happening in February 2010. That’s my two and half month old son “talking” to his father in Dubai!
I have an eighth tip for new moms:
8. Utilize all available technology to make your life a little easier!
Whether it’s Skype to talk to a partner or family at a distance, DVR to record your favorite shows to watching during baby’s feeding times or the timer on your coffee pot set the night before so you can survive another long day with baby, use it! And whatever you don’t have can be added to your baby registry.
On another note, never in my life– at least not in the first 42 years when I didn’t have children– did I imagine I would someday be a mommy blogger. But I hope my experiences (most of them by trial and error…) and advice will resonate with other parents.
Thursday, April 30th, 2015 • No Comments on April: the month in review
Oh, this month! April almost killed me. Literally. I fell sick at the end of March and in 72 hours I went from thinking I had a cold or maybe the flu to being in the ER, followed by the ICU. The diagnosis was pneumonia and I was apparently in septic shock when I arrived at the hospital, which is pretty serious stuff from what I learned after a few days there. It all seems a bit surreal now, being told after the fact that they weren’t sure I was going to make it, but I’m here to tell the tale. Or write about it, when I find the words.
Fashionable in a hospital gown
And so, I spent the first several days of April in the hospital and the past few weeks recuperating. Jay’s birthday and Easter were both celebrated over a week late because I was sick and hospitalized. I didn’t see any movies and, sadly, I didn’t even read any books. I envy those people who can read a stack of books when they’re sick. I had a book with me in the hospital and I couldn’t focus on anything for more than a few minutes. That continued to be the case even after I got home– I just couldn’t read. So I rested– a lot– and I thought– a lot– and I plotted– a lot. I desperately wanted to write, but I don’t think I’ve ever been as tired as I was this month, not even when I was very pregnant. So I have a lot of ideas in my head and jotted in notes on my iPhone and hopefully I will translate these ideas and notes into some good, publishable stuff in the coming months.
I may have not done much writing this month– a whopping seven hours (and that’s been in the past three days)– but I’ve had a few sales and a few publications. I sold two more essays to The Mid this month, for a total of three so far!, and my first two pieces have been published. The Mid is a terrific new website with a ton of content already, so if you find yourself in the “messy middle” of life, do check them out! There are essays and articles about everything from parenting to relationships to pop culture and I’ve found several new writers to follow. Here are the links to my current posts:
Why Don’t Adults Have Best Friends? (Originally “Seeking a Best Friend Like Me”)
10 Times You’ve Used Your Kids as an Excuse
I’m also very excited about an essay I sold to Narratively. It was the fastest acceptance I’ve ever received for an essay (six hours!) or, really, any piece of writing where I didn’t already have a working relationship with the editor. “Where Babies Come From” will be published in just a couple of weeks and I’m very proud of this piece– it’s incredibly personal and poignant and not like anything else I’ve ever written.
Finally, I’m officially joining the ranks of “mommy bloggers” in May! I’ll be blogging several times a month at mom.me about parenting, kids, family life and whatever else they’ll let me write about. I’m thrilled to be given this opportunity to share my experiences and my first piece–7 New Mom Tips from a Military Spouse— goes live tomorrow. Considering that I knew absolutely nothing about babies or motherhood until I was 42 years old, it’s mind boggling that I’m now writing about it!
Since April was a wash for having time to write, I still have two novel proposals to finish writing and editing in May. Plus a couple of short stories to write for upcoming anthologies, as well as my freelance assignments and a few other ideas I’d like to work on. I’m not sure where or how I’ll find time for all of that– the reality is probably somewhere between accomplishing everything I want to do and accepting what I’ll actually be able to carve out time do. Probably only one novel proposal will get sent off. Some of the essay ideas will get pushed to June or July. But after a month of illness, exhaustion and recovery, I am ready to get back to myself!
May is my birthday month and I’ll be 48 one week from today! Someone asked what I was going to do for my birthday, as I have a reputation for celebrating “birthday week” and making my birthday last as long as possible. This year will be a quiet birthday, though I still intend to celebrate all week long. But after this month, I’m just grateful to be healthy, to be alive, and to have such a wonderful, happy life.
Happy Spring and Happy May from Clementine and me!
Tuesday, March 31st, 2015 • No Comments on March: The month in review
Well loved monkey.
Despite the fact that we had snow flurries last weekend, it really is spring! March was far more productive for me than February was and I’m bouncing into April with big plans and high hopes.
The monkey belongs to my youngest son. He and I made our debut in the Washington Post last week. This poor guy inspired an essay about love, Maurice Sendak and cute aggression.
I understand wanting to devour what you love. I understand the ache of need and the sense of belonging that is making my cute little boys sink sharp baby teeth into their monkeys.
(You can read the rest at: My kids are eating their lovies)
This month also brought the release of my anthology Three of Hearts: Erotic Romance for Women. This collection of erotic romance threesomes was one of my favorite anthologies to edit. This steamy, romantic collection has stories from Tiffany Reisz, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Angela Capterton and a dozen more talented authors, plus a foreword from one of my longtime inspirations, Alison Tyler. No matter how many more anthologies I may edit, this one is going to stay with me for the variety of sexy threesomes, the depth of emotion and the sheer sensuality these authors packed into their stories.
Also this month, I cracked a new market and sold an essay to a relatively new website called The Mid. I’ve been quite impressed with the essays they’re running– especially since I’m the demographic they’re targeting!– and I’m looking forward to joining the lineup.
I think that’s it for sales and new releases this month. The horror story I wrote in January was rejected, as was an essay I wrote for the New York Times. In both cases, I knew it was a long shot– the horror anthology received something like a thousand submissions (!!) and the NYT is, well, the NYT. But still, good to stretch myself and try.
This month I read Precious Thing by Colette McBeth– a book that twisted me ’round and ’round and I’m still thinking about it. Right now I’m reading Chelsea Cain’s Heartsick— another twisty little book that I’m happy is the first in a series of mysteries.
I saw a few movies this month, too. Kingsman wasn’t what I expected, but it was fun to see Colin Firth as a badass spy. Run All Night was exactly what it looks like, but I adore Liam Neeson no matter how mediocre the movie. And it was fun to revisit the geriatric gang in The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.
I had 26.5 writing hours this month, compared to only 17.5 last month. Those are hours I get outside the house, alone, focused. I try to squeeze in hours here and there at home with the family, with various degrees of success. It’s not much, but I’m still managing to be somewhat productive. It’ll get better in the fall when the boys are both in school and I have 3 days a week (the little one will only go to school MWF), every week, during the school year. Something to look forward to, along with more adjustments to make. Until then, I’m being as productive as I can be given the time I have.
April will be a tough month for writing. Jay is in a transition program to become a teacher (and he’s already been offered a job for the 2015-2016 school year!), which has him in class, either online or in-person, several days a week on top of his work schedule. So I’m pretty much on parent duty non-stop through April and May. But hopefully I’ll squeeze some work hours in. Right now, I have copyedits to work on for my July anthology Best Erotic Romance of the Year (formerly Best Erotic Romance 2015). I’ll also spend this month finishing and polishing two novel proposals to send to a literary agent who has requested them. And, hopefully, writing a few new essays and sending them out into the world.
Have a lovely April!